Toil and Trouble

Some days, I need an anthem to remind me of what’s real, of what’s important, and help me sort my way out of the clamor of all the things that others seem to shout around me.

I’ve been tossed about the political rants going on by friends I like, respect, and care very much about.  The things they say are sometimes very thought provoking – but under close examination they are actually very opinionated and frequently they resort to inflammatory insults being flung against those who hold different views.  I see that they are also being influenced by others who will insist that their sources are the ones to be trusted -but they don’t cite their sources.  Are they trustworthy enough for me to check out?  Why not mention them?  Since some of these friends are friends I’ve known and loved for many years, it’s been bewildering to me to see how they got where they are.  And, am I in the right place not to join them?  Shouldn’t I have some remedy to the predicaments and ills that they are trying to address before I sneer at their options/conclusions?  There’s this stifling sense of responsibility – but no direction for me to apply it to.

I also see that many of my beloveds are struggling financially just like I am, with this shaky economic predicament our world and our country is in.  I have been unemployed without any income since June.  I have to leave my rented home and have chosen to accept my son’s generous offer to move in with him until I can find a new job and another independent situation.  His job ended last week, so all of a sudden the question became – are we both homeless?

Thankfully, I learned this morning that God has enabled me to get a very low wage job working in retail.  I LOVE working in retail during the holidays, so this is something I am wholly grateful for.  As I continue looking for something at a better wage, I am considering keep this job to work alternately with the other one.  However, since I only have the low wage right now, neither of us can get enough money together for December’s rent.  I am mostly packed up and my current home is nearly empty, and I am poised for the move to his now threatened home this weekend.  Is this not what God wants?  Are we supposed to just find alternate situations instead?  A decision needed to be made – and rather soon!

I networked with a few folks, and – thankfully – I found a way to work out December’s rent for us.  We’ll still have to work out electric bills, food, gas and we’ve both got car insurance and he’s got car payments to work out.  So, our situation is still very tenuous.  But for right now – there’s a sense of relief, mercy, and thanksgiving for this first hurdle’s resolution.

I might excel at Crisis Management because I’ve generally had to do it so often – but I would ever prefer it not involve my personal needs for shelter, health care, or resources for income.   In other words, this kind of crisis management I despise and avoid.  I do my mightiest to build resources to guard against it!  However, God knows my character needs to keep growing, keep building, and that I need to keep leaning on Him with faith and trust.  It’s often through our crying out that we finally listen to what is most critically important:  I am not here to simply live out a life of ease and prosperity.  I am not even here to impress anyone else with my talents and abilities.  I am here to reflect the character of a merciful and gracious God to those who are doing all that I am – but in a darker more hopeless way.  Which means I can’t stay so dark or hopeless myself, if I really mean what I have been saying or believing.   Well, that sure puts me in my place, doesn’t it?

I need to see the plight of those God wants me to reach out to.  I need to remember how it feels to be where they are.  They haven’t woken up to God as a real entity yet.  They are stumbling along the best that they can, and they have perhaps dimly heard God’s voice in their past – but it’s gotten faint, now.  I need to be centered in my NOW in order to be available to reflect God to even just my beloveds, if not the rest of the world that I live in.  I am here to live out a message of unlimited grace, incomprehensible mercy, and immutable truth.  I need to express what I found out is real about God in every situation – no matter how challenging, egregious, damaging, victorious, triumphant, and marvelous.  He’s here – I know it because I sense His nearness just like I sense the nearness of others who love me.  He cares about YOU, and we all matter.

There are scriptures galore to support all of these statements, and if you want to know them send me a comment and I’ll send them to you.  If you know of a scripture that disagrees with something in my blog at any time – please DO tell me so in comments!  But right now, my point is that each of us will live out God’s will differently – that’s why He created us different from one another.  Once we find out that He’s real, we need to be certain that we are living out what He’s called us to do (or to see if someone else – a Pastor perhaps – is living out God’s will).  Be very sure of this: He will NEVER call you to do something that scripture has told us is outside of God’s holy will.  If you have someone in your life who ‘s saying something the Bible disagrees with – don’t follow them.  God will fix it eventually, and you don’t want to be an accomplice who shares their consequences!  The same goes for you if you feel like doing something that is clear to you as being against what Scripture has stated is outside of God’s desire for his beloveds.  You don’t lose His love at all – but you’re out of order.  Any loving parent will help sort that out before giving you treasures and gifts.  That’s just how love works.

So, as I was reviewing all that I knew about the more urgent crises of the day, I was feeling very stressed, limited, mortal, and human.  I honestly have fought against despair many times in the past few months with several funerals, job loss, inability to secure a new job, expensive car repairs that totaled my savings, as well as the impending loss of my home – life is tough!  We get tired.  We get depressed.  We grieve and we hurt, and we even lose sight of hope for better anything ahead.  There’s no energy left for the work, and we get overwhelmed.  A way out looks much preferable to any possible way through.

Then, someone writes a song that becomes a wonderful anthem that reminds me/you/us of what’s important.  I almost feel like Paul must have on that road to Damascus when he was “spotlighted” for a moment with God.

Yes, for such a time as this – I was placed on this earth.  I can embrace it, and celebrate it.  Right now.  Right here.

Copyright © 2013 Churchmousie ~ all rights reserved.


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